18 days

Wow Im a bum i havent written in the thing in like a week, actually the other day i went to write on in it but i was interupted by a phone call that ended up lasting through the night hah.
WOW SO:
Update:

Im leaving in 18 days and Im so so so excited. Im actually so excited that last night in my sleep sarah heard me talking and apparently this is what I was saying:
"Ok"
"Mhmm"
"Thank YOU!"
"Im so excited GOd"

HAHAHA! OH MAN!
Im am really really excited.
I walked outside today and said. "its so hot right now!"
Sarahs mom Paige just looked at me and laughed.

Now to the sirious stuff:

This is what Ive been chewing on latley:

1 Corinthians 15:55
O death, where is your victory?
O death, where is your sting?”
For sin is the sting that results in death, and the law gives sin its power. But thank God! He gives us victory over sin and death through our Lord Jesus Christ.
So, my dear brothers and sisters, be strong and immovable. Always work enthusiastically for the Lord, for you know that nothing you do for the Lord is
ever useless.

How beautiful is that! Nothing we do is ever useless. (Goodness! Me breaking up with Ian was not useless! all this heartache is not useless!) In the world, if we put effort into somthing, theres always a chance that the effort is usless. You can apply it to almost anything. You can work as hard as you possibly can to get something, and it just doesnt happen, making all that effort useless. In relationships, its the same deal, you can pour your heart out completley to someone, bear your soul, take on thier burnens, involve your life into thiers, and they can still just up and leave, making all that effort and emotion that you just put into that relationship useless. With Jesus everything is different and I love it. Nothing is useless. He sees the little stuff, like when we make little desicions that honor Him and make Him smile, he sees it! It counts for something! So I can have all these hopes hor God to use me in crazy ways when I go to Uganda (in 18 days ahah) but even if God doesnt use me in big ways, hes sees my effort, and it counts for something! I love it.

Ive been starting to pack, if thats what you want to call it.
Its not really packing, since all of my belongings are still not upacked since I moved into Sarahs.
Ive been planning to pack.
I have countless lists of the exact things I need to buy and pack.
For example:

• the two pairs of skinny jeans from pacsun
• every tank top you own
• tiger dress
• cardboard pants
• pink dress shirt thing Phe gave me in Thailand
• brown skirt
• white skirt
• yellow flower skirt
• rediculously long white tshirt
• feed the children tshirt (have sarah take the sides in, the darn things still too big)
• toms shoes (get second pair)

the list goes on.

I still have to buy a journal, well, Im thinking about just making one. And I still have to find out what coffee Julie was talking about, and I have to get my new lip rings too. GAH! Im so unorganized. Ive been praying for God to be able to use me like crazy while Im there, and I already have the feeling that im going to want to stay longer. I have a feeling that this is where GOd is going to show me who he wants me to be, Im sure he will use these beautiful women in my life just as much and if not more to impact me that I will be im pacting them. Janis said I would come back different. Im looking forward to that. Im starting to not like the idea of missing my friends, (these are my friends, they have my back, they are the closest thing to blood that i have BAHAHAH CODY IM GOING TO MISS YOU) I already miss Jammers and Sarah so much and they have only been in Cali for less than a month (they are working with invisible children for the next few months, they are a blessing to me in themselves, its so refreshing to know that people my age have the same passion to see the love of Jesus lived out through our own young hands and feet, its seems like so many people these days are just candles blown out, they got nothing left to burn for exept themselves) God has been providing me with so many people to just pour into me and love me before i leave and i cant wait to turn that around on the women im going to meet!